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Love and Money: Does Discussing Money Make You a Gold Digger?

by Ashley Jones

Most people believe the number one cause of divorce is infidelity, which in some instances, it is. But what is interchangeably the number one cause of divorce with infidelity? Money. 


No matter how much we try to detest its value, money plays a major role in our relationships. Money makes the difference between honeymooning in Paris or at your in-law's timeshare in Florida. Money helps you decide if you want one child or four children. Money determines whether or not you'll be able to stay at home and take care of the children or prepare to re-enter the workforce after 6-8 weeks. Again, money has a major impact on our relationships. 


As the season changes and the excitement of summer weddings brews, you must challenge yourself to discuss money with your significant other. I'll admit, I felt a little awkward bringing up the conversation with my boyfriend because I didn't want him to believe I was a "gold digger," but after witnessing a number of my friends' frustrations with their significant other's mismanagement of money, I decided to have the talk... But I did it with a little bit of help.


Have you ever heard of Dr. Boyce Watkins? He's the guy behind the Mountain Dew controversy. Well, aside from raising hell about negative portrayals of the Black community, he is a noted finance scholar. He was the only Black man to graduate with a PhD in finance in 2002 and he has authored a number of scholarly journals about finance. His perspective on money is completely different from most people's, so I decided to purchase his book titled "Financial Lovemaking 101: Merging Assets With Your Partner In Ways that Feel Good." I think that was the best $20 I've ever spent! 


The key things I learned are:

1) Why I should discuss money with my significant other

2) How money affects our relationship 

3) How to understand each other's credit reports

4) The benefits of making love financial


I don't want to spill all of the beans because there are so many more points I can touch on, but I want you to tell me what you think. My boyfriend and I are much happier since we've discussed our finances. And I oddly feel more connected to him as I do when we're intimate.


I just purchased the electronic form of the book so that I can read it on my iPad. Please tell me how it works out for you by emailing me at!


Good luck!



Purchase the eBook Here.




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